J.I. Packer~ Knowing God

Why are we not free enough from fear and anxiety to allow ourselves to go full stretch in following Christ?
One reason it seems that in our heart of hearts we are afraid of the consequences of going the whole way into the Christian life. We shrink from from accepting burdens of responsibility for others because we fear we should not have strength to bear them. We shrink from accepting a way of life in which we forfeit material security because we are afraid of being left stranded. We shrink from being meek because we are afraid that if we do not stand up for ourselves we shall be trodden down and victimized, and end up among life's casualties and failures. We shrink from breaking with social conventions in order to serve Christ because we fear that if we did, the established structure of our life would collapse all round us, leaving us without a footing anywhere.
It is these half-conscious fears, this dread of insecurity, rather than any deliberate refusal to face the cost of following Christ, which make us hold back. We feel that the risks of out-and-out discipleship are too great for us to take. In other words, we are not persuaded of the adequacy of God to provide for all the needs of those who launch out wholeheartedly on to the deep sea of unconventional living in obedience to the call of Christ.
Therefore, we feel obliged to break the first commandment just a little, by withdrawing a certain amount of our time and energy from serving God in order to serve mammon.
This, at bottom, seems to be what is wrong with us. We are afraid to go all the way in accepting the authority of God, because of our secret uncertainty as to His adequacy to look after us if we do.

101. A clear look at my life.
102. Sisters.
103. Food on the table.
104. Warm clothes in this cold weather.
105. My boyfriend's new job.
106. Finally finding a chiropractor.
107. A quiet house to think and plan and work in.
108. The opportunity to serve God in my work.
109. Witnessing by example.